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On the Shortcomings of the English Language

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May. 1st, 2001 | 02:50 pm
mood: contemplativecontemplative
music: Qkumba Zoo - The Child Inside

I am having a problem with my essays. I have an obsession with truth and essences -- though those are not really the precies words that I mean. The problem is that I can't think of a word in the english language that quite names what it is that I am obsessed with correctly. My obsession is, I think that there is a higher form to everything. There is a more ideal version of it, a more perfect idea of it... a something that when it exists, it is obvious. It is felt intangibly and unaccountably, and yet it is a universal feeling.

Perhaps I should include this paragraph in my essay. Or at least that last sentence... because that sentence is more or less part of the idea that I am attempting to get at. I think. I know what my idea is, and what I want to say, but I feel as though I am not saying it.

And my teacher still found my essay logical. This baffles me.

I imagine that my obsession with dichotomies doesn't help matters, either. In every essay I have written this year, it seems that some dichotomy has emerged. Reality and unreality. Beauty and pain. Truth and Humor. Reflection (meandering) and Idea. Seeing and Knowing. And int the current essay, finding and losing. In other classes, too, I have seen a dichotomy. Modern and primitive. Tradition and Change. Hopes and Disappointments.

I refuse to see the world in an either-or way -- I see relationships between opposites in which they are dependent upon each other, they are defined by each other, and they are enhanced by each other.

Mr. Softee is my new friend. And I need to do Laundry. Those have nothing to do with one another. Oh well.

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