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i am frigid like where i come from

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Nov. 23rd, 2000 | 03:10 am

I am an ice queen. I truly am.

I saw the boy today (well it's technically yesterday now, but it's still today in my mind since I haven't slept yet) and we had a good time. It was odd, though because he was kissing me and said he wanted to make me happy the way I make him happy. I pointed out that that will never happen.

I am questioning this whole thing way too much. Of course, when it's me, I want to be swept off my feet. I like silly romantic gestures. I like flowers and candy and poetry and sweet things. I liked when Matt wrote a song for me. That is still one of the most special things anyone has ever done for me. I miss him.

The funny thing (well, it isn't that it's funny per se, but this is one of those times when the english langauge fails to provide me with the correct word for my sentiment) is that I am the suspicious type. As soon as someone does something nice for me, I wonder what it is that they're expecting in return. Although I don't think that's entirely unjustified in most cases. Especially not with 18-25 year old guys. They want you for your body and that is the end of it. I suppose it's not true in a genuine sense, but it feels that way sometimes... or most of the time.

So the hopeless romantic in me that wants to be swept off her feet will never come to a meeting of the minds with the typical college male who just wants play. But I guess things work, somehow.

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Comments {1}


from: hilarykay
date: Nov. 23rd, 2000 06:06 am (UTC)

I have been in that situation many times-it is very difficult. just be true to yourself-don't worry about the pressure other people put on you- and you will have no regrets.

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